








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1426 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 270 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 118 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 112 matches | ||
| Premier | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 75 matches | ||
| Faceit | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 53 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 130 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




214 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13705 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,441 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10560 | 43% |
| Smokes | 5533 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4872 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3476 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,539,224 of utility $198 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2234 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Femboy Vi | 65% | 65 |
| #2 | YIFFPEEK mooncat | 63% | 157 |
| #3 | property in Egypt | 59% | 471 |
| #4 | SlipperZ | 57% | 137 |
| #5 | ΛDZアズАдз | 52% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YIFFPEEK mooncat | 42 | 0.0130 |
| #2 | property in Egypt | 32 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | Katarina | 20 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | ineedahiro | 15 | 0.0072 |
| #5 | McFarty101 :3 | 12 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faye ~ ♡ :3 | 826 | 0.32 | 18 min |
| #2 | property in Egypt | 709 | 0.08 | 13 min |
| #3 | SlipperZ | 570 | 0.20 | 14 min |
| #4 | ΛDZアズАдз | 432 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #5 | ineedahiro | 347 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Femboy Vi | +4.57 | 78 | 69 |
| #2 | hannah | +4.44 | 79 | 51 |
| #3 | SlipperZ | +3.08 | 79 | 66 |
| #4 | Rapier | +2.78 | 70 | 56 |
| #5 | YIFFPEEK mooncat | +1.07 | 73 | 56 |





