








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 271 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 135 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1307 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,077 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4867 | 48% |
| Smokes | 2715 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 715 | 7% |
| Molotovs | 1780 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $408,618 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blaze | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | Mai | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | SLAYN by a #GirlBoss | 56% | 34 |
| #4 | Mateusz | 53% | 66 |
| #5 | ᵈʳⁱⁿᵏⁱⁿ ᵒᵘᵗ ᵒᶠ ᶜᵘᵖˢ | 52% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Mateusz | 53% | 66 |
| #5 | ᵈʳⁱⁿᵏⁱⁿ ᵒᵘᵗ ᵒᶠ ᶜᵘᵖˢ | 52% | 75 |
| #6 | KEBAB ENJOYER | 50% | 20 |
| #7 | Oda Nobunaga | 46% | 61 |
| #8 | Daniel Chadcliffe | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oda Nobunaga | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Mateusz | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | ᵈʳⁱⁿᵏⁱⁿ ᵒᵘᵗ ᵒᶠ ᶜᵘᵖˢ | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | SLAYN by a #GirlBoss | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | KEBAB ENJOYER | 2 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mateusz | 505 | 0.37 | 14 min |
| #2 | ᵈʳⁱⁿᵏⁱⁿ ᵒᵘᵗ ᵒᶠ ᶜᵘᵖˢ | 232 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #3 | KEBAB ENJOYER | 165 | 0.38 | 4 min |
| #4 | Oda Nobunaga | 140 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | SLAYN by a #GirlBoss | 87 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SLAYN by a #GirlBoss | +2.52 | 73 | 50 |
| #2 | Mateusz | +2.14 | 62 | 86 |
| #3 | KEBAB ENJOYER | +1.84 | 54 | 84 |
| #4 | Jorbon | +0.88 | 54 | 84 |
| #5 | Blaze | +0.48 | 82 | 56 |





