








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 810 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 740 matches | ||
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6826 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,531 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4924 | 23% |
| Smokes | 6203 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4350 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 6054 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,160,654 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 65 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beaglemetralha | 54% | 79 |
| #2 | Noctis | 51% | 203 |
| #3 | Patrick de Paula | 49% | 75 |
| #4 | Mr. Kilmister | 49% | 165 |
| #5 | Caio | 48% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | W 7 | 45% | 219 |
| #13 | Maradona ON | 45% | 98 |
| #14 | ET_bilu | 44% | 358 |
| #15 | #semfofoca CRAZY PULGA | 41% | 177 |
| #16 | Fabin.Laden | 40% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ET_bilu | 50 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | #semfofoca CRAZY PULGA | 34 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Coruja | 14 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | pudinzera | 13 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Noctis | 12 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ET_bilu | 966 | 0.13 | 25 min |
| #2 | pudinzera | 827 | 0.22 | 25 min |
| #3 | W 7 | 690 | 0.15 | 16 min |
| #4 | Mr. Kilmister | 646 | 0.18 | 18 min |
| #5 | Noctis | 564 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beaglemetralha | +1.71 | 55 | 68 |
| #2 | Coruja | +1.47 | 58 | 68 |
| #3 | ET_bilu | +1.41 | 54 | 62 |
| #4 | Noctis | +0.65 | 79 | 55 |
| #5 | Fabin.Laden | +0.34 | 62 | 60 |





