








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 809 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 832 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8262 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,866 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7441 | 23% |
| Smokes | 8239 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 9081 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 8105 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,253,788 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fabin.Laden | 56% | 57 |
| #2 | Maradona ON | 53% | 121 |
| #3 | AGROBOY | 52% | 81 |
| #4 | pudinzera | 51% | 226 |
| #5 | Leo Lanches | 50% | 336 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ET_bilu | 33 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | #semfofoca CRAZY PULGA | 25 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | pudinzera | 24 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | W 7 | 18 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Leo Lanches | 13 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pudinzera | 1072 | 0.22 | 32 min |
| #2 | W 7 | 886 | 0.13 | 22 min |
| #3 | ET_bilu | 818 | 0.11 | 20 min |
| #4 | Leo Lanches | 621 | 0.09 | 19 min |
| #5 | Noctis | 620 | 0.13 | 15 min |





