








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 791 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 815 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6292 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,304 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7237 | 22% |
| Smokes | 9075 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 7709 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 9283 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,135,203 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 217 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ET_bilu | 49% | 336 |
| #2 | AGROBOY | 48% | 164 |
| #3 | Beaglemetralha | 48% | 52 |
| #4 | pudinzera | 48% | 142 |
| #5 | Kurdt_Suicide | 48% | 197 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Leo Lanches | 43% | 154 |
| #13 | Caio | 42% | 116 |
| #14 | Fabin.Laden | 41% | 44 |
| #15 | Maradona ON | 40% | 72 |
| #16 | Mr. Kilmister | 38% | 119 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ET_bilu | 45 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | Noctis | 29 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | #semfofoca CRAZY PULGA | 20 | 0.0079 |
| #4 | AGROBOY | 17 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | Coruja | 15 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noctis | 972 | 0.14 | 22 min |
| #2 | ET_bilu | 899 | 0.12 | 22 min |
| #3 | pudinzera | 741 | 0.24 | 23 min |
| #4 | Cavalks | 697 | 0.13 | 21 min |
| #5 | Coruja | 607 | 0.09 | 18 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ET_bilu | +1.52 | 55 | 62 |
| #2 | Coruja | +1.36 | 61 | 70 |
| #3 | Beaglemetralha | +0.86 | 58 | 65 |
| #4 | Noctis | +0.66 | 79 | 54 |
| #5 | #semfofoca CRAZY PULGA | +0.28 | 76 | 41 |





