








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 407 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 736 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 84 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12324 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 45,485 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12669 | 28% |
| Smokes | 14140 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 11521 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 7155 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,544,289 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2440 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShlimeDitty | 59% | 135 |
| #2 | Abe | 56% | 415 |
| #3 | TEANIE PEANIR | 56% | 394 |
| #4 | Nemo | 56% | 305 |
| #5 | alex | 55% | 163 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | TEANIE PEANIR | 56% | 394 |
| #4 | Nemo | 56% | 305 |
| #5 | alex | 55% | 163 |
| #6 | Shady Milkman | 53% | 99 |
| #7 | matt-E | 35% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nemo | 19 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Abe | 15 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | TEANIE PEANIR | 12 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | ShlimeDitty | 11 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | Shady Milkman | 6 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nemo | 1017 | 0.16 | 28 min |
| #2 | TEANIE PEANIR | 690 | 0.09 | 18 min |
| #3 | Abe | 502 | 0.06 | 13 min |
| #4 | matt-E | 448 | 0.32 | 13 min |
| #5 | ShlimeDitty | 237 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xlout | +3.25 | 78 | 61 |
| #2 | Nemo | +1.83 | 72 | 71 |
| #3 | Abe | +0.59 | 63 | 51 |
| #4 | ShlimeDitty | -0.40 | 61 | 36 |
| #5 | alex | -0.82 | 75 | 41 |





