








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 565 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 144 matches | ||
| Faceit | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6436 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,701 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5710 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4458 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3783 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3750 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,824,489 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 551 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matty | 57% | 276 |
| #2 | VastoLorde | 56% | 43 |
| #3 | xDanko | 54% | 48 |
| #4 | KhalteN | 53% | 436 |
| #5 | Briggley | 53% | 476 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matty | +3.18 | 76 | 76 |
| #2 | bENNY7 | +2.30 | 75 | 64 |
| #3 | xDanko | +0.94 | 82 | 54 |
| #4 | KhalteN | +0.83 | 71 | 71 |
| #5 | Briggley | -0.21 | 67 | 74 |





