








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 518 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 116 matches | ||
| Faceit | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4379 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,485 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6998 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5848 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5791 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4848 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,105,616 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 667 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matty | 56% | 285 |
| #2 | bENNY7 | 53% | 476 |
| #3 | joe_dB | 53% | 40 |
| #4 | KhalteN | 52% | 396 |
| #5 | Advoc8 | 52% | 449 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Advoc8 | 52% | 449 |
| #6 | DutchMonkey | 52% | 157 |
| #7 | VastoLorde | 49% | 43 |
| #8 | xDanko | 48% | 56 |
| #9 | Weenus Lover | 44% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bENNY7 | 21 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | KhalteN | 18 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Matty | 12 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Advoc8 | 11 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | DutchMonkey | 9 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KhalteN | 1512 | 0.18 | 44 min |
| #2 | bENNY7 | 1092 | 0.11 | 28 min |
| #3 | Matty | 665 | 0.11 | 19 min |
| #4 | Advoc8 | 483 | 0.05 | 10 min |
| #5 | DutchMonkey | 299 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matty | +3.16 | 76 | 75 |
| #2 | bENNY7 | +2.24 | 74 | 63 |
| #3 | xDanko | +0.99 | 81 | 49 |
| #4 | KhalteN | +0.84 | 71 | 71 |
| #5 | Briggley | -0.26 | 67 | 74 |





