








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 166 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
789 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,617 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 669 | 12% |
| Smokes | 996 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2261 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 1691 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,679,788 of utility $339 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 596 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chralle | 50% | 26 |
| #2 | Primdahl | 41% | 34 |
| #3 | Super Monkey 🇩🇰 | 41% | 59 |
| #4 | Maria <3 | 38% | 69 |
| #5 | Hammeren | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Allanlind83 | 25% | 16 |
| #12 | PeterTheViking | 24% | 92 |
| #13 | Rekylvand | 23% | 117 |
| #14 | Nocko ♿凸(¬‿¬)凸♿ | 14% | 14 |
| #15 | ⓡⓐⓢⓜⓤⓢ | 11% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bromie | 16 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | Rekylvand | 12 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | fangool | 6 | 0.0276 |
| #4 | PeterTheViking | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Super Monkey 🇩🇰 | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rekylvand | 262 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #2 | Bromie | 120 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #3 | C-rap | 109 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | PeterTheViking | 51 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | Super Monkey 🇩🇰 | 38 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nocko ♿凸(¬‿¬)凸♿ | +6.91 | 81 | 74 |
| #2 | Chralle | +6.68 | 80 | 47 |
| #3 | fangool | +6.59 | 77 | 61 |
| #4 | Super Monkey 🇩🇰 | +4.63 | 42 | 32 |
| #5 | C-rap | +1.41 | 39 | 73 |





