








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 251 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3201 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,575 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1416 | 15% |
| Smokes | 3012 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2246 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2901 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,061,575 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 24 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Reign | 53% | 45 |
| #8 | Big L | 53% | 19 |
| #9 | Froge | 52% | 88 |
| #10 | FatPimpzzz | 48% | 121 |
| #11 | Shoenice | 42% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PuppetM4str | 45 | 0.0092 |
| #2 | Froge | 24 | 0.0139 |
| #3 | FatPimpzzz | 23 | 0.0090 |
| #4 | . | 19 | 0.0149 |
| #5 | Reign | 11 | 0.0116 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PuppetM4str | 516 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #2 | Worst CS Player | 283 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | FatPimpzzz | 254 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | Reign | 205 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #5 | Froge | 195 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PuppetM4str | +2.92 | 75 | 57 |
| #2 | Chuntis | +1.33 | 68 | 53 |
| #3 | Big L | +1.13 | 59 | 62 |
| #4 | . | +1.06 | 77 | 29 |
| #5 | Froge | +0.89 | 63 | 50 |





