








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 197 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2809 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,476 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1199 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2090 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1677 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1510 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $980,488 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cheesenipps | 54% | 26 |
| #2 | Conray13 | 53% | 161 |
| #3 | Deep Water Trout Goku | 52% | 193 |
| #4 | Hunter | 47% | 190 |
| #5 | msn | 45% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Deep Water Trout Goku | 52% | 193 |
| #4 | Hunter | 47% | 190 |
| #5 | msn | 45% | 55 |
| #6 | vegeta Atlantic salmon | 45% | 69 |
| #7 | Ovad | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hunter | 27 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | Deep Water Trout Goku | 11 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | vegeta Atlantic salmon | 9 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | Conray13 | 8 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | msn | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hunter | 915 | 0.24 | 23 min |
| #2 | Deep Water Trout Goku | 280 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #3 | Conray13 | 198 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | msn | 113 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | vegeta Atlantic salmon | 47 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hunter | +2.05 | 78 | 67 |
| #2 | msn | +0.77 | 81 | 66 |
| #3 | Deep Water Trout Goku | +0.57 | 64 | 49 |
| #4 | Conray13 | +0.50 | 58 | 46 |
| #5 | Bunion_Knight | -0.60 | 41 | 44 |





