








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 919 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 131 matches | ||
| Premier | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4578 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,116 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2221 | 18% |
| Smokes | 4253 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 2529 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3113 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,650,975 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 347 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TechSexy | 56% | 34 |
| #2 | Conray13 | 54% | 324 |
| #3 | Cheesenipps | 53% | 135 |
| #4 | Bunion_Knight | 52% | 196 |
| #5 | msn | 51% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Cheesenipps | 53% | 135 |
| #4 | Bunion_Knight | 52% | 196 |
| #5 | msn | 51% | 89 |
| #6 | Hunter | 51% | 299 |
| #7 | vegeta Atlantic salmon | 48% | 94 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hunter | 36 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | vegeta Atlantic salmon | 19 | 0.0100 |
| #3 | Conray13 | 15 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Bunion_Knight | 12 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | Cheesenipps | 7 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hunter | 1496 | 0.25 | 38 min |
| #2 | Conray13 | 646 | 0.10 | 16 min |
| #3 | msn | 216 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | Bunion_Knight | 211 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | Cheesenipps | 146 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hunter | +2.22 | 78 | 70 |
| #2 | Deep Water Trout Goku | +1.66 | 64 | 51 |
| #3 | Conray13 | +1.02 | 58 | 45 |
| #4 | msn | +0.82 | 81 | 63 |
| #5 | Bunion_Knight | -1.06 | 40 | 42 |





