








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 405 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




58 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2119 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,061 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2309 | 38% |
| Smokes | 1331 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1205 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1216 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $351,642 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1567 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anfu | 69% | 26 |
| #2 | 1mega | 67% | 15 |
| #3 | hoof | 62% | 21 |
| #4 | King Fahd Esports | 55% | 31 |
| #5 | niko | 54% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | niko | 14 | 0.0603 |
| #2 | bekky | 12 | 0.0120 |
| #3 | g4med1 | 9 | 0.0130 |
| #4 | nigga sexy 352 | 8 | 0.0106 |
| #5 | King Fahd Esports | 7 | 0.0107 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | poe | 176 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #2 | kez | 134 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | Anfu | 93 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | bekky | 65 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | King Fahd Esports | 47 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | poe | +6.45 | 95 | 60 |
| #2 | PoopFart69 | +4.12 | 82 | 60 |
| #3 | Secret | +1.80 | 72 | 46 |
| #4 | kez | +0.40 | 73 | 58 |
| #5 | g4med1 | +0.03 | 66 | 48 |





