








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 363 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3543 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,750 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3276 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1642 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1887 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1945 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $581,824 of utility $71 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2506 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | poe | 62% | 78 |
| #2 | Anfu | 59% | 112 |
| #3 | hoof | 58% | 31 |
| #4 | King Fahd Esports | 57% | 23 |
| #5 | bekky | 54% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | poe | 336 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #2 | Anfu | 327 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | PoopFart69 | 313 | 0.30 | 7 min |
| #4 | bekky | 225 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | Secret | 87 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | poe | +7.49 | 93 | 62 |
| #2 | PoopFart69 | +5.64 | 88 | 67 |
| #3 | King Fahd Esports | +2.42 | 84 | 48 |
| #4 | bekky | +1.47 | 75 | 44 |
| #5 | Secret | +1.19 | 78 | 42 |





