








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 202 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1304 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,094 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1154 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1276 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1543 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1121 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $766,687 of utility $216 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 396 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aito Nacci | 59% | 32 |
| #2 | 𝐒𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐦 | 56% | 9 |
| #3 | TomasVeikko | 55% | 11 |
| #4 | Hiki | 51% | 35 |
| #5 | DATBOI | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Ryökäle | 41% | 46 |
| #11 | Norphe | 38% | 13 |
| #12 | Vainottaja | 33% | 15 |
| #13 | jUKEE | 33% | 21 |
| #14 | Musti | 21% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WilhelmTwister | 6 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Hiki | 3 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | Sonni | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | Sergej | 3 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | Crusifer | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WilhelmTwister | 210 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #2 | jUKEE | 140 | 0.28 | 4 min |
| #3 | Hiki | 131 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | Crusifer | 107 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Sergej | 63 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WilhelmTwister | +4.23 | 70 | 71 |
| #2 | Crusifer | +1.94 | 72 | 71 |
| #3 | Sonni | +1.93 | 73 | 40 |
| #4 | DATBOI | +1.57 | 81 | 45 |
| #5 | jUKEE | +1.24 | 75 | 69 |





