








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 205 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 86 matches | ||
| Wingman | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 43 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4650 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,051 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6634 | 41% |
| Smokes | 5230 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2146 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 2041 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,267,052 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 41 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Navilicous | 72% | 36 |
| #2 | Keli96 | 64% | 83 |
| #3 | Lars | 63% | 130 |
| #4 | ✪ sJEF | 60% | 62 |
| #5 | Chillnub | 55% | 149 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | kulsi~ | 49% | 408 |
| #9 | ☂️ ✘aiizyツ | 47% | 72 |
| #10 | eellie01 | 37% | 90 |
| #11 | LordEndre^.^ | 35% | 97 |
| #12 | mundsen | 18% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kulsi~ | 14 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | ☂️ ✘aiizyツ | 12 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | ISS TH, BREAK FROM MM ツ | 10 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | eellie01 | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Keli96 | 5 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kulsi~ | 1243 | 0.16 | 30 min |
| #2 | LordEndre^.^ | 458 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #3 | ISS TH, BREAK FROM MM ツ | 326 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #4 | eellie01 | 270 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #5 | Keli96 | 251 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kulsi~ | +3.12 | 79 | 63 |
| #2 | ISS TH, BREAK FROM MM ツ | +2.20 | 75 | 56 |
| #3 | Lars | +2.10 | 42 | 67 |
| #4 | Navilicous | +0.79 | 61 | 57 |
| #5 | Keli96 | +0.69 | 72 | 69 |





