








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 90 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
976 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,832 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 411 | 22% |
| Smokes | 332 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 708 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 381 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $165,065 of utility $62 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 45 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chug | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | Bäzingen | 73% | 15 |
| #3 | 𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫 | 47% | 121 |
| #4 | Mini | 46% | 57 |
| #5 | vrtgx. | 44% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vrtgx. | 69 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | Mini | 58 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | jade | 48 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | 𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫 | 45 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | chug | 30 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | p4905 | +4.31 | 79 | 66 |
| #2 | 𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫𒐫 | +2.10 | 65 | 43 |
| #3 | vrtgx. | +1.96 | 82 | 47 |
| #4 | Mini | -0.86 | 58 | 27 |
| #5 | Erm what the spruce | -1.53 | 53 | 30 |





