








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1012 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 54 matches | ||
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




108 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5351 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,888 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3199 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3651 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4283 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2755 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,311,552 of utility $206 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1433 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DANNYG-NUTBUTTER-EMPIRE♡ | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | ##RR dawnz | 56% | 109 |
| #3 | Deathallss | 46% | 155 |
| #4 | incstinct | 45% | 242 |
| #5 | Rouszeau | 44% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ##RR dawnz | 56% | 109 |
| #3 | Deathallss | 46% | 155 |
| #4 | incstinct | 45% | 242 |
| #5 | Rouszeau | 44% | 114 |
| #6 | i drink and drive | 42% | 292 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i drink and drive | 91 | 0.0159 |
| #2 | Deathallss | 68 | 0.0219 |
| #3 | incstinct | 23 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | ##RR dawnz | 23 | 0.0108 |
| #5 | Rouszeau | 11 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i drink and drive | 604 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #2 | ##RR dawnz | 500 | 0.24 | 10 min |
| #3 | incstinct | 384 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #4 | Deathallss | 378 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #5 | DANNYG-NUTBUTTER-EMPIRE♡ | 43 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ##RR dawnz | +3.64 | 81 | 61 |
| #2 | incstinct | +3.32 | 81 | 40 |
| #3 | Luu | +2.46 | 46 | 53 |
| #4 | Deathallss | +1.43 | 78 | 58 |
| #5 | DANNYG-NUTBUTTER-EMPIRE♡ | -3.52 | 31 | 38 |





