








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 78 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
494 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,408 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 249 | 7% |
| Smokes | 893 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 877 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1389 | 41% |
Our logs show you have wasted $760,988 of utility $230 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✞ Ƥrɨm[e] ✞ | 47% | 17 |
| #2 | AMMA_KamiKaze | 46% | 95 |
| #3 | Fallen Do Mercadona | 36% | 42 |
| #4 | S1mple do LIDL | 34% | 163 |
| #5 | NiKo do Pingo Doce | 29% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | AMMA_KamiKaze | 46% | 95 |
| #3 | Fallen Do Mercadona | 36% | 42 |
| #4 | S1mple do LIDL | 34% | 163 |
| #5 | NiKo do Pingo Doce | 29% | 45 |
| #6 | Dosia do Continente | 19% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AMMA_KamiKaze | 20 | 0.0102 |
| #2 | S1mple do LIDL | 16 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | NiKo do Pingo Doce | 7 | 0.0077 |
| #4 | ✞ Ƥrɨm[e] ✞ | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S1mple do LIDL | 630 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #2 | AMMA_KamiKaze | 140 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Fallen Do Mercadona | 95 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | ✞ Ƥrɨm[e] ✞ | 51 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | NiKo do Pingo Doce | 19 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AMMA_KamiKaze | +4.40 | 72 | 53 |
| #2 | Fallen Do Mercadona | +2.19 | 89 | 68 |
| #3 | ✞ Ƥrɨm[e] ✞ | +2.01 | 49 | 58 |
| #4 | S1mple do LIDL | +1.77 | 78 | 69 |
| #5 | NiKo do Pingo Doce | -2.26 | 37 | 54 |





