








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 276 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 254 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2324 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,424 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2226 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1972 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1967 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2259 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,189,080 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 107 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sugus | 62% | 26 |
| #2 | Jutaami | 57% | 37 |
| #3 | Monki | 53% | 32 |
| #4 | FaZe allu | 52% | 62 |
| #5 | angry | 51% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pro.bolboquic | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | ᶠʳᶦˢᵇ rasse! | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Monki | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Punga creamy.RU | 2 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | beenman | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | osumaslayer | 485 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #2 | beenman | 291 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #3 | Erska | 289 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | angry | 281 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | tamago | 236 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Punga creamy.RU | +5.59 | 80 | 65 |
| #2 | Jutaami | +2.98 | 86 | 67 |
| #3 | beenman | +2.70 | 76 | 66 |
| #4 | osumaslayer | +2.49 | 67 | 69 |
| #5 | angry | +1.98 | 68 | 71 |





