








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 120 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 50 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2773 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,315 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1003 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1823 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1839 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1650 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $494,039 of utility $79 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 66 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drill_In_Wall | 47% | 17 |
| #2 | julo | 41% | 158 |
| #3 | Flo | 40% | 234 |
| #4 | pay pander | 40% | 128 |
| #5 | Serafin | 36% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Flo | 40% | 234 |
| #4 | pay pander | 40% | 128 |
| #5 | Serafin | 36% | 77 |
| #6 | Flosul | 36% | 25 |
| #7 | Silas | 35% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flo | 91 | 0.0203 |
| #2 | pay pander | 38 | 0.0146 |
| #3 | Drill_In_Wall | 15 | 0.0460 |
| #4 | julo | 10 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Silas | 5 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flo | 164 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #2 | julo | 87 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #3 | Silas | 51 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Flosul | 32 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | pay pander | 21 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drill_In_Wall | +2.84 | 85 | 44 |
| #2 | Flo | +2.69 | 86 | 39 |
| #3 | Lars | +0.46 | 52 | 42 |
| #4 | Serafin | -0.23 | 43 | 23 |
| #5 | Silas | -0.74 | 66 | 58 |





