








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 287 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4284 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,423 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3514 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2769 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1993 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 4147 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,107,221 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 459 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boketto | 59% | 182 |
| #2 | stormzyy | 59% | 165 |
| #3 | stattik | 58% | 53 |
| #4 | nomanasendhelp | 56% | 39 |
| #5 | Fyre ツ | 56% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Silky | 52% | 62 |
| #10 | germ | 52% | 217 |
| #11 | Escolik ツ | 51% | 82 |
| #12 | J3y | 50% | 44 |
| #13 | Russtbh | 50% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Peregrinus | 9 | 0.0104 |
| #2 | stormzyy | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Boketto | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Russtbh | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | germ | 2 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | germ | 1327 | 0.27 | 33 min |
| #2 | stormzyy | 611 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #3 | bluefalcon | 548 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #4 | Boketto | 525 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| #5 | 💀💀💀 | 502 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stattik | +3.60 | 78 | 73 |
| #2 | not iceman | +1.72 | 79 | 62 |
| #3 | stormzyy | +1.59 | 80 | 64 |
| #4 | germ | +0.99 | 75 | 66 |
| #5 | J3y | +0.43 | 78 | 66 |





