










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 4 different maps




Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
132 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 228 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 64 | 28% |
| Smokes | 54 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 45 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 65 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $97,108 of utility $273 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Linkoo | 46% | 13 |
| #2 | Bruinsquad1 | 41% | 17 |
| #3 | BigFella | 39% | 18 |
| #4 | gatoraderaccon | 35% | 17 |
| #5 | Faizfire123 | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Linkoo | 46% | 13 |
| #2 | Bruinsquad1 | 41% | 17 |
| #3 | BigFella | 39% | 18 |
| #4 | gatoraderaccon | 35% | 17 |
| #5 | Faizfire123 | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gatoraderaccon | 4 | 0.0120 |
| #2 | Bruinsquad1 | 1 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Linkoo | 1 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bruinsquad1 | 38 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #2 | gatoraderaccon | 19 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #3 | Linkoo | 16 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #4 | BigFella | 9 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | Faizfire123 | 9 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigFella | +5.91 | 87 | 43 |
| #2 | Faizfire123 | +0.40 | 66 | 60 |
| #3 | Linkoo | -1.01 | 46 | 56 |
| #4 | Bruinsquad1 | -2.19 | 59 | 68 |
| #5 | Kyo | -2.61 | 52 | 36 |





