








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 248 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 131 matches | ||
| Premier | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4803 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,338 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1204 | 14% |
| Smokes | 2634 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1920 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2580 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,139,625 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 446 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Patty | 66% | 59 |
| #2 | gatoraderaccon | 63% | 114 |
| #3 | poizon | 60% | 86 |
| #4 | Linkoo | 59% | 138 |
| #5 | Bruinsquad1 | 58% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Bruinsquad1 | 58% | 130 |
| #6 | evanerfbdgcn | 54% | 54 |
| #7 | Faizfire123 | 51% | 83 |
| #8 | Lekey Zeke | 43% | 23 |
| #9 | m1nt | 39% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gatoraderaccon | 13 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | Bruinsquad1 | 11 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | evanerfbdgcn | 10 | 0.0095 |
| #4 | Linkoo | 8 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | Lekey Zeke | 5 | 0.0108 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bruinsquad1 | 271 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #2 | Lekey Zeke | 181 | 0.39 | 5 min |
| #3 | gatoraderaccon | 165 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | Linkoo | 164 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | Patty | 102 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigFella | +5.24 | 81 | 47 |
| #2 | Lekey Zeke | +2.88 | 75 | 63 |
| #3 | m1nt | +1.84 | 79 | 48 |
| #4 | Bruinsquad1 | -0.60 | 56 | 65 |
| #5 | Linkoo | -0.96 | 51 | 52 |





