








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 745 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 216 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 173 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 158 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 103 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 103 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6451 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,651 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1797 | 21% |
| Smokes | 4612 | 53% |
| HE Grenades | 1328 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 914 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,703,596 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 685 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hina | 55% | 262 |
| #2 | Godot | 53% | 244 |
| #3 | spotify premium | 52% | 441 |
| #4 | uadfb75t6hst | 50% | 282 |
| #5 | ダイワスカーレット | 49% | 258 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | uadfb75t6hst | 50% | 282 |
| #5 | ダイワスカーレット | 49% | 258 |
| #6 | ダンツフレーム | 49% | 538 |
| #7 | MANBO | 48% | 186 |
| #8 | ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 39% | 251 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ダンツフレーム | 26 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | spotify premium | 17 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 16 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | uadfb75t6hst | 15 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | ダイワスカーレット | 12 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ダンツフレーム | 748 | 0.07 | 16 min |
| #2 | hina | 628 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #3 | Godot | 497 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| #4 | uadfb75t6hst | 291 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #5 | spotify premium | 279 | 0.03 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Godot | +3.47 | 71 | 47 |
| #2 | hina | +3.26 | 71 | 55 |
| #3 | ラプラス・ダークネス | +2.11 | 61 | 36 |
| #4 | MANBO | +1.39 | 56 | 38 |
| #5 | ダンツフレーム | +0.58 | 44 | 50 |





