








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1611 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 336 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 205 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 99 matches | ||
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Faceit | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 134 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14609 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 45,362 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 17022 | 38% |
| Smokes | 11982 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6784 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 9574 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,989,898 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2342 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SayNoMore | 65% | 75 |
| #2 | Jrs | 63% | 92 |
| #3 | Nuby | 61% | 184 |
| #4 | ♛ | 61% | 201 |
| #5 | SnoopMeow | 60% | 490 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | Arnab | 53% | 274 |
| #15 | 淺淺爱吃McFlurry™ | 53% | 182 |
| #16 | 𝙑𝙞𝙧𝙪𝙨.♛ | 52% | 66 |
| #17 | King | 50% | 119 |
| #18 | cR. | 44% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SnoopMeow | 27 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Nuby | 12 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | nuts666 | 10 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Arnab | 9 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | zeal | 7 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SnoopMeow | 2084 | 0.21 | 53 min |
| #2 | nuts666 | 1448 | 0.17 | 40 min |
| #3 | 淺淺爱吃McFlurry™ | 1195 | 0.33 | 30 min |
| #4 | zeal | 1036 | 0.20 | 28 min |
| #5 | KOOSTA | 993 | 0.19 | 29 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GuM | +3.85 | 84 | 72 |
| #2 | zeal | +2.84 | 70 | 70 |
| #3 | dino | +2.36 | 72 | 77 |
| #4 | ♛ | +2.18 | 67 | 77 |
| #5 | Jrs | +1.10 | 55 | 61 |





