








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 292 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 188 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2506 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,121 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1002 | 12% |
| Smokes | 2323 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2625 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2171 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $921,632 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Pot80 | 49% | 120 |
| #8 | slobodan666 | 46% | 148 |
| #9 | IPOMAN | 44% | 104 |
| #10 | augustus | 44% | 89 |
| #11 | ogokkaaj | 43% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slobodan666 | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Paapparipa | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Pot80 | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | are | 5 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | augustus | 4 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pot80 | 445 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #2 | are | 422 | 0.21 | 12 min |
| #3 | Paapparipa | 351 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | slobodan666 | 280 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #5 | augustus | 251 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | are | +2.14 | 60 | 77 |
| #2 | Aaku | +1.44 | 53 | 73 |
| #3 | Pot80 | +0.99 | 81 | 69 |
| #4 | Janimati | +0.38 | 59 | 49 |
| #5 | augustus | +0.29 | 60 | 59 |





