








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 365 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 145 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2238 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,531 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1912 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2432 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1279 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1908 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $910,799 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AzrN | 58% | 19 |
| #2 | Raymond Le Roi du Saucisson | 57% | 70 |
| #3 | Alu- | 51% | 74 |
| #4 | Everdose | 51% | 77 |
| #5 | Biggi_007 | 50% | 145 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Everdose | 51% | 77 |
| #5 | Biggi_007 | 50% | 145 |
| #6 | Sighen | 50% | 108 |
| #7 | Akah24 | 46% | 131 |
| #8 | Defreid | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sighen | 13 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Biggi_007 | 12 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Akah24 | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Alu- | 6 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Everdose | 4 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Biggi_007 | 658 | 0.21 | 17 min |
| #2 | Sighen | 340 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | Akah24 | 332 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #4 | Raymond Le Roi du Saucisson | 279 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #5 | Everdose | 159 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AzrN | +2.90 | 53 | 70 |
| #2 | Biggi_007 | +0.49 | 68 | 70 |
| #3 | Alu- | +0.11 | 32 | 63 |
| #4 | Sighen | +0.00 | 39 | 66 |
| #5 | Clap | -0.16 | 49 | 67 |





