








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 29 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1329 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,321 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1750 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1654 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1303 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1614 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $292,703 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | werneri | 59% | 32 |
| #2 | Le0 | 50% | 16 |
| #3 | V7kke | 50% | 114 |
| #4 | hakukuu | 49% | 129 |
| #5 | Joonas | 48% | 149 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | V7kke | 50% | 114 |
| #4 | hakukuu | 49% | 129 |
| #5 | Joonas | 48% | 149 |
| #6 | Reijo | 46% | 105 |
| #7 | juhnu | 33% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hakukuu | 11 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Joonas | 10 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | Reijo | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | V7kke | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | werneri | 2 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joonas | 847 | 0.27 | 20 min |
| #2 | V7kke | 185 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | hakukuu | 164 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | Reijo | 96 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | werneri | 41 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joonas | +2.80 | 73 | 68 |
| #2 | V7kke | +1.69 | 71 | 67 |
| #3 | arskadegen | +0.12 | 56 | 67 |
| #4 | werneri | -0.56 | 63 | 41 |
| #5 | Reijo | -1.30 | 50 | 41 |





