








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 13 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1177 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,347 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 713 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1132 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1174 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1328 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $255,846 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | werneri | 70% | 20 |
| #2 | Le0 | 50% | 12 |
| #3 | arskadegen | 50% | 114 |
| #4 | Joonas | 49% | 118 |
| #5 | hakukuu | 48% | 108 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Le0 | 50% | 12 |
| #3 | arskadegen | 50% | 114 |
| #4 | Joonas | 49% | 118 |
| #5 | hakukuu | 48% | 108 |
| #6 | Reijo | 45% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joonas | 11 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | hakukuu | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | arskadegen | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Reijo | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | werneri | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joonas | 712 | 0.29 | 16 min |
| #2 | arskadegen | 467 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| #3 | hakukuu | 140 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | Reijo | 88 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | werneri | 24 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joonas | +2.96 | 75 | 66 |
| #2 | V7kke | +1.62 | 71 | 67 |
| #3 | arskadegen | -0.03 | 59 | 67 |
| #4 | werneri | -0.58 | 64 | 45 |
| #5 | Reijo | -1.27 | 50 | 42 |





