








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 62 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 73 matches | ||
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2441 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,576 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1256 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1961 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 965 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1394 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $304,002 of utility $55 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kenny | 71% | 28 |
| #2 | Dpunch26 | 66% | 59 |
| #3 | Helen Keller | 61% | 59 |
| #4 | Brandon | 59% | 63 |
| #5 | Vik | 59% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andylovesmangos | 26 | 0.0134 |
| #2 | collob | 13 | 0.0138 |
| #3 | Brandon | 10 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | Helen Keller | 7 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | Raunny | 6 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raunny | 493 | 0.24 | 14 min |
| #2 | Andylovesmangos | 440 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #3 | collob | 252 | 0.27 | 7 min |
| #4 | Helen Keller | 201 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #5 | Jøsh | 192 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Helen Keller | +5.98 | 93 | 65 |
| #2 | jjjjj | +4.84 | 90 | 46 |
| #3 | kenny | +3.46 | 81 | 51 |
| #4 | Raunny | +1.52 | 73 | 70 |
| #5 | Brandon | +1.39 | 72 | 64 |





