








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 895 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 317 matches | ||
| Faceit | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 60 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4713 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,332 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8451 | 32% |
| Smokes | 7597 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3878 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 6406 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $953,120 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 699 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dorA | 62% | 39 |
| #2 | kreyzi | 61% | 80 |
| #3 | NAKO LFT | 59% | 32 |
| #4 | Nexuz | 58% | 184 |
| #5 | ilikememes♡ | 57% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | mastus | 53% | 97 |
| #10 | TurboRunk♿ | 52% | 42 |
| #11 | 2bi2 | 52% | 197 |
| #12 | Emil | 52% | 33 |
| #13 | Sjop | 47% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nexuz | 17 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | 2bi2 | 16 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Fripop ❟❛❟ | 14 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | KriZ | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Sjop | 5 | 0.0071 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2bi2 | 753 | 0.18 | 23 min |
| #2 | Nexuz | 600 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #3 | KriZ | 571 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #4 | mastus | 383 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #5 | Fripop ❟❛❟ | 368 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Emil | +2.08 | 84 | 66 |
| #2 | NAKO LFT | +2.01 | 80 | 65 |
| #3 | Tox1c_Fla1r | +1.90 | 66 | 74 |
| #4 | dorA | +1.71 | 79 | 61 |
| #5 | mastus | +1.47 | 76 | 71 |





