








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 24 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
511 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 835 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 130 | 16% |
| Smokes | 211 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 317 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 177 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $68,316 of utility $30 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Jay Huncho | 138 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #2 | マチ゠コマチネ | 65 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Nailz | 54 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | Darby | 49 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #5 | kennyWonderchild | 38 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | benzo | +6.05 | 90 | 47 |
| #2 | kennyWonderchild | +3.19 | 67 | 53 |
| #3 | Nailz | +2.42 | 63 | 69 |
| #4 | Philadelphia Collins | +1.96 | 72 | 39 |
| #5 | マチ゠コマチネ | +1.62 | 81 | 51 |





