








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 969 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 77 matches | ||
| Wingman | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




94 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4556 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,474 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3005 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1561 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2300 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1608 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,726,333 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5571 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Magnus Olander | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | 𝔅𝔦𝔤,₯✉✈✔ | 58% | 57 |
| #3 | Alex | 57% | 53 |
| #4 | PINOxr | 53% | 36 |
| #5 | . | 49% | 308 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | . | 62 | 0.0106 |
| #2 | Passters | 21 | 0.0239 |
| #3 | Dahlen :D | 19 | 0.0308 |
| #4 | Jrrky𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴 67? | 13 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | Alex | 12 | 0.0115 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | . | 637 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #2 | Passters | 207 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #3 | Jrrky𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴 67? | 197 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | 𝔅𝔦𝔤,₯✉✈✔ | 122 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Dahlen :D | 61 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝔅𝔦𝔤,₯✉✈✔ | +8.49 | 98 | 49 |
| #2 | . | +2.72 | 67 | 39 |
| #3 | Passters | +1.10 | 58 | 44 |
| #4 | p1mple | +0.90 | 39 | 34 |
| #5 | 76561198833244241 | -0.09 | 56 | 38 |





