








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 561 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 155 matches | ||
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Wingman | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5028 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,836 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5799 | 28% |
| Smokes | 5353 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4260 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 5424 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,089,128 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 165 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AyKay -A- | 77% | 26 |
| #2 | xmaarvN | 69% | 118 |
| #3 | danyy | 66% | 32 |
| #4 | gergaut | 65% | 123 |
| #5 | butschiii | 63% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | ナッシー | 54% | 26 |
| #9 | SirRaffley | 52% | 33 |
| #10 | Dake | 51% | 91 |
| #11 | dqbitus | 50% | 52 |
| #12 | Majah HNL | 49% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YaEnte | 18 | 0.0089 |
| #2 | Dake | 8 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | dqbitus | 6 | 0.0058 |
| #4 | gergaut | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | xmaarvN | 4 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | butschiii | 574 | 0.29 | 17 min |
| #2 | xmaarvN | 481 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #3 | shrimpySツ | 391 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #4 | gergaut | 259 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #5 | Dake | 228 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | No Money 3 Kids | +3.69 | 81 | 71 |
| #2 | AyKay -A- | +3.26 | 66 | 88 |
| #3 | danyy | +2.24 | 83 | 76 |
| #4 | gergaut | +2.07 | 83 | 59 |
| #5 | xmaarvN | +0.87 | 85 | 61 |





