








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 109 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 271 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2620 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,782 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 645 | 8% |
| Smokes | 2318 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2824 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 1995 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,337,569 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 92 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roger Cocaciel | 53% | 49 |
| #2 | CHU CHOQUÉ ! | 48% | 148 |
| #3 | Joking-radio | 45% | 252 |
| #4 | Wobbey | 42% | 89 |
| #5 | 破壊の神 Kawzin | 38% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roger Cocaciel | 53% | 49 |
| #2 | CHU CHOQUÉ ! | 48% | 148 |
| #3 | Joking-radio | 45% | 252 |
| #4 | Wobbey | 42% | 89 |
| #5 | 破壊の神 Kawzin | 38% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CHU CHOQUÉ ! | 38 | 0.0131 |
| #2 | Joking-radio | 26 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | 破壊の神 Kawzin | 5 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | Wobbey | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Roger Cocaciel | 3 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joking-radio | 337 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #2 | CHU CHOQUÉ ! | 251 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #3 | Wobbey | 159 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Roger Cocaciel | 68 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | 破壊の神 Kawzin | 31 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roger Cocaciel | +4.31 | 82 | 52 |
| #2 | CHU CHOQUÉ ! | +1.96 | 50 | 54 |
| #3 | Joking-radio | +0.76 | 40 | 48 |
| #4 | 破壊の神 Kawzin | -0.28 | 63 | 23 |
| #5 | Wobbey | -0.81 | 48 | 52 |





