








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 55 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
997 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,549 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 592 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1016 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 371 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 570 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $302,248 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roger Cocaciel | 50% | 12 |
| #2 | Joking-radio | 44% | 61 |
| #3 | AidsDispenser | 42% | 89 |
| #4 | CHU CHOQUÉ ! | 34% | 38 |
| #5 | 破壊の神 Kawzin | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roger Cocaciel | 50% | 12 |
| #2 | Joking-radio | 44% | 61 |
| #3 | AidsDispenser | 42% | 89 |
| #4 | CHU CHOQUÉ ! | 34% | 38 |
| #5 | 破壊の神 Kawzin | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CHU CHOQUÉ ! | 5 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | Joking-radio | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | 破壊の神 Kawzin | 2 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | AidsDispenser | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | Roger Cocaciel | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joking-radio | 101 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #2 | CHU CHOQUÉ ! | 63 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | AidsDispenser | 22 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #4 | Roger Cocaciel | 21 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | 破壊の神 Kawzin | 10 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roger Cocaciel | +4.49 | 84 | 59 |
| #2 | CHU CHOQUÉ ! | +1.88 | 53 | 52 |
| #3 | 破壊の神 Kawzin | +0.78 | 52 | 23 |
| #4 | Joking-radio | +0.70 | 38 | 52 |
| #5 | Wobbey | -0.64 | 49 | 53 |





