








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1576 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 750 matches | ||
| Wingman | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 159 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8534 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,362 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1637 | 10% |
| Smokes | 1262 | 8% |
| HE Grenades | 8086 | 49% |
| Molotovs | 5377 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,837,453 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 276 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ACE | 45% | 56 |
| #10 | sleeeepy_qt | 42% | 55 |
| #11 | ◔◡◔Breasticles | 41% | 147 |
| #12 | Enzo | 41% | 165 |
| #13 | MessyMarv | 38% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BskooL | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Enzo | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | ◔◡◔Breasticles | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | 40AiR | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | MLG Milkman ✪ | 4 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BskooL | 437 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #2 | 40AiR | 384 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #3 | MessyMarv | 216 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #4 | BamBam42 | 192 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | ◔◡◔Breasticles | 183 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thanny | +5.97 | 86 | 56 |
| #2 | MLG Milkman ✪ | +3.90 | 82 | 62 |
| #3 | Last Impulse | +1.33 | 59 | 54 |
| #4 | Large Man on The Educational Ins | +1.32 | 66 | 43 |
| #5 | BamBam42 | +1.18 | 46 | 70 |





