








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 874 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 226 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 63 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2717 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,673 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3841 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2150 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2608 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2074 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,530,491 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 267 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ruxio | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | Last Impulse | 60% | 48 |
| #3 | thanny | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | Hades | 55% | 33 |
| #5 | Sussy Russy | 54% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | ◔◡◔Breasticles | 43% | 35 |
| #11 | GaryThaGoat^ | 41% | 32 |
| #12 | Enzo | 40% | 111 |
| #13 | 40AiR | 38% | 40 |
| #14 | Arum | 28% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 40AiR | 9 | 0.0108 |
| #2 | Ru55kiii | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Enzo | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | ◔◡◔Breasticles | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | Last Impulse | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MessyMarv | 271 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #2 | 40AiR | 136 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | GaryThaGoat^ | 121 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | Last Impulse | 92 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Arum | 90 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thanny | +7.23 | 90 | 61 |
| #2 | MLG Milkman ✪ | +5.07 | 86 | 50 |
| #3 | GaryThaGoat^ | +2.85 | 76 | 70 |
| #4 | Large Man on The Educational Ins | +2.23 | 71 | 39 |
| #5 | Last Impulse | +2.13 | 59 | 56 |





