








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1357 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,801 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1351 | 48% |
| Smokes | 395 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 751 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 304 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $365,502 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leodyn | 68% | 63 |
| #2 | zylox | 65% | 26 |
| #3 | MilkyDurag | 62% | 34 |
| #4 | ✦︎ Lyme ✦ | 61% | 66 |
| #5 | Toestiir | 58% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ✦︎ Lyme ✦ | 61% | 66 |
| #5 | Toestiir | 58% | 19 |
| #6 | Seren | 53% | 17 |
| #7 | Hyper_Skunk | 53% | 17 |
| #8 | MaddHands | 50% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leodyn | 17 | 0.0139 |
| #2 | ✦︎ Lyme ✦ | 13 | 0.0102 |
| #3 | MaddHands | 8 | 0.0127 |
| #4 | MilkyDurag | 7 | 0.0107 |
| #5 | zylox | 5 | 0.0103 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✦︎ Lyme ✦ | 227 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #2 | Leodyn | 180 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | MaddHands | 119 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | Hyper_Skunk | 84 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #5 | zylox | 78 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Leodyn | +6.85 | 92 | 49 |
| #2 | ✦︎ Lyme ✦ | +5.34 | 85 | 64 |
| #3 | Seren | +4.96 | 72 | 67 |
| #4 | zylox | +1.77 | 74 | 52 |
| #5 | MaddHands | +1.32 | 77 | 65 |





