








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1474 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 135 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 105 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




70 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3208 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,170 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1807 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1194 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1368 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1801 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,106,557 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1617 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MiRePo93 | 65% | 54 |
| #2 | Hiltsa | 58% | 69 |
| #3 | Beef Jezos | 57% | 260 |
| #4 | BrainDamage | 55% | 64 |
| #5 | Dog | 52% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Beef Jezos | 57% | 260 |
| #4 | BrainDamage | 55% | 64 |
| #5 | Dog | 52% | 27 |
| #6 | Vilja | 51% | 37 |
| #7 | Tomppi | 49% | 184 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beef Jezos | 23 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Tomppi | 17 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Hiltsa | 11 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | Vilja | 10 | 0.0140 |
| #5 | BrainDamage | 3 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beef Jezos | 368 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #2 | Tomppi | 308 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #3 | Hiltsa | 206 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | BrainDamage | 91 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | MiRePo93 | 82 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MiRePo93 | +5.76 | 79 | 59 |
| #2 | Hiltsa | +5.19 | 65 | 58 |
| #3 | Dog | +4.23 | 72 | 58 |
| #4 | Tomppi | +1.99 | 61 | 38 |
| #5 | Skorppari fani #1 | +1.87 | 40 | 29 |





