








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 360 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 116 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1608 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,127 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 499 | 8% |
| Smokes | 961 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 2215 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 2452 | 40% |
Our logs show you have wasted $868,193 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツL1ndst3nツ | 48% | 92 |
| #2 | B I A S | 48% | 126 |
| #3 | lcs | 46% | 182 |
| #4 | blind guy ⊕☁ | 41% | 158 |
| #5 | bel1eveツ | 40% | 118 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | bel1eveツ | 40% | 118 |
| #6 | L1tt4u *woops* | 40% | 106 |
| #7 | Nissen Lucky | 38% | 26 |
| #8 | Bot Andy | 33% | 21 |
| #9 | Doggie | 33% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lcs | 13 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | blind guy ⊕☁ | 11 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | ツL1ndst3nツ | 10 | 0.0121 |
| #4 | bel1eveツ | 8 | 0.0097 |
| #5 | B I A S | 5 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lcs | 325 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | blind guy ⊕☁ | 170 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | B I A S | 152 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | bel1eveツ | 81 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | L1tt4u *woops* | 63 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lcs | +5.76 | 87 | 63 |
| #2 | ツL1ndst3nツ | +4.56 | 93 | 45 |
| #3 | B I A S | +3.56 | 88 | 51 |
| #4 | Nissen Lucky | +1.89 | 84 | 39 |
| #5 | Doggie | +0.46 | 25 | 70 |





