








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 168 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 326 matches | ||
| Faceit | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3536 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,294 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4319 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4845 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5164 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3966 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,385,936 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 206 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jalek1 | 53% | 156 |
| #2 | Kinkura | 52% | 60 |
| #3 | jiikeri | 51% | 57 |
| #4 | Apinamies | 50% | 168 |
| #5 | Th0mas | 50% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | E-urheilu☂Aqua | 46% | 140 |
| #7 | Shaageli | 44% | 59 |
| #8 | g0ldyy | 42% | 154 |
| #9 | Snopinen | 36% | 61 |
| #10 | iumi | 36% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0ldyy | 16 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | jalek1 | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Th0mas | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Apinamies | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | jiikeri | 3 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0ldyy | 1050 | 0.31 | 29 min |
| #2 | Apinamies | 758 | 0.21 | 22 min |
| #3 | jalek1 | 410 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #4 | E-urheilu☂Aqua | 274 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #5 | Snopinen | 125 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0ldyy | +2.55 | 81 | 77 |
| #2 | jiikeri | +1.92 | 73 | 62 |
| #3 | jalek1 | +1.74 | 76 | 58 |
| #4 | Apinamies | +1.45 | 81 | 76 |
| #5 | E-urheilu☂Aqua | +0.49 | 68 | 67 |





