








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1415 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 253 matches | ||
| Faceit | 245 matches | ||
| Wingman | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 89 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7066 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,347 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10544 | 35% |
| Smokes | 7906 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6354 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5543 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,383,784 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 564 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shaageli | 52% | 246 |
| #2 | Th0mas | 52% | 406 |
| #3 | jiikeri | 51% | 310 |
| #4 | jalek1 | 51% | 639 |
| #5 | Kinkura | 51% | 284 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Kinkura | 51% | 284 |
| #6 | Kali | 50% | 168 |
| #7 | mlinkku | 49% | 59 |
| #8 | smagis | 48% | 94 |
| #9 | Jeppo | 48% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jalek1 | 16 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | jiikeri | 13 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Th0mas | 6 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Shaageli | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Kinkura | 5 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jalek1 | 1711 | 0.13 | 56 min |
| #2 | Th0mas | 476 | 0.05 | 16 min |
| #3 | smagis | 368 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #4 | Kali | 363 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #5 | jiikeri | 310 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jalek1 | +2.07 | 74 | 61 |
| #2 | Apinamies | +1.23 | 81 | 74 |
| #3 | jiikeri | +0.59 | 74 | 59 |
| #4 | Th0mas | -0.38 | 71 | 60 |
| #5 | Kali | -1.49 | 75 | 67 |





