








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 232 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 50 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
996 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,982 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1474 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1058 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1891 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1559 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $580,451 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mixu –¦– | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | yoManChigago | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | Michael Phelps | 46% | 200 |
| #4 | Make | 43% | 63 |
| #5 | 𖤓 Pavetti 𖤓 | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | 𖤓 Pavetti 𖤓 | 42% | 26 |
| #6 | Fress1 | 42% | 84 |
| #7 | MURSU | 40% | 52 |
| #8 | THE PEPS1 –¦– | 40% | 172 |
| #9 | Free Hasbulla–¦– | 34% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THE PEPS1 –¦– | 23 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | Michael Phelps | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Free Hasbulla–¦– | 6 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | MURSU | 6 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | Make | 4 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THE PEPS1 –¦– | 822 | 0.24 | 19 min |
| #2 | Michael Phelps | 548 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #3 | Make | 199 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | MURSU | 180 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | Free Hasbulla–¦– | 157 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Michael Phelps | +5.32 | 87 | 60 |
| #2 | mixu –¦– | +4.23 | 85 | 71 |
| #3 | THE PEPS1 –¦– | +1.87 | 80 | 72 |
| #4 | 𖤓 Pavetti 𖤓 | +1.72 | 73 | 61 |
| #5 | MURSU | +0.01 | 69 | 59 |





