








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 834 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 351 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3678 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,965 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3894 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4710 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4054 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4307 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,176,005 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Diablond_ | 43% | 224 |
| #5 | Silaise | 43% | 334 |
| #6 | KryTiZz | 40% | 169 |
| #7 | Jean-Bernie | 38% | 32 |
| #8 | A Silly Raccoon | 24% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Diablond_ | 12 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Silaise | 11 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Thanators | 8 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | KryTiZz | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Jew Manji | 5 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Diablond_ | 513 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #2 | KryTiZz | 491 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #3 | Silaise | 258 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| #4 | Jew Manji | 217 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #5 | Thanators | 216 | 0.04 | 4 min |





