








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 455 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 193 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2782 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,861 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3285 | 37% |
| Smokes | 2540 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 915 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 2121 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $455,398 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 420 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vector | 54% | 26 |
| #2 | H3LIX | 53% | 15 |
| #3 | riahoZ | 50% | 72 |
| #4 | PriZm | 50% | 200 |
| #5 | british_ethan | 47% | 184 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | british_ethan | 47% | 184 |
| #6 | Camdle | 45% | 69 |
| #7 | pmin | 45% | 205 |
| #8 | wys | 43% | 83 |
| #9 | bon | 32% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | british_ethan | 27 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | PriZm | 18 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | pmin | 8 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Camdle | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | Vector | 5 | 0.0086 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PriZm | 1123 | 0.26 | 30 min |
| #2 | pmin | 545 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #3 | british_ethan | 423 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #4 | Camdle | 247 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #5 | riahoZ | 202 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pablo | +1.91 | 81 | 57 |
| #2 | PriZm | +0.77 | 47 | 77 |
| #3 | wys | -0.40 | 41 | 51 |
| #4 | british_ethan | -0.49 | 70 | 46 |
| #5 | pmin | -0.66 | 42 | 48 |





