








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 479 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 175 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




147 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7465 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,837 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2660 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2977 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4027 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 4173 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,265,968 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2958 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JP | 55% | 49 |
| #2 | ustu lebs | 54% | 205 |
| #3 | RIKANOL | 52% | 246 |
| #4 | Jorgo | 50% | 306 |
| #5 | horsecock | 42% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JP | 55% | 49 |
| #2 | ustu lebs | 54% | 205 |
| #3 | RIKANOL | 52% | 246 |
| #4 | Jorgo | 50% | 306 |
| #5 | horsecock | 42% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RIKANOL | 75 | 0.0162 |
| #2 | horsecock | 17 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | JP | 17 | 0.0184 |
| #4 | Jorgo | 13 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | ustu lebs | 12 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RIKANOL | 702 | 0.15 | 15 min |
| #2 | Jorgo | 418 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| #3 | ustu lebs | 255 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | horsecock | 161 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | JP | 133 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lasse | +2.91 | 76 | 46 |
| #2 | JP | +1.27 | 76 | 44 |
| #3 | Jorgo | -0.01 | 73 | 61 |
| #4 | RIKANOL | -0.75 | 65 | 42 |
| #5 | ustu lebs | -2.33 | 54 | 41 |





