








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 483 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 89 matches | ||
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4730 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,405 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4819 | 28% |
| Smokes | 5853 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2028 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 4705 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,138,807 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 中華製 | 67% | 63 |
| #2 | ALTO | 64% | 73 |
| #3 | Remi | 64% | 36 |
| #4 | deafblind | 61% | 57 |
| #5 | iAMTSUJ1 | 61% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | omeshima | 11 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | miyA | 10 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | hiiragi | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | k1p! | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | iAMTSUJ1 | 4 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | miyA | 1179 | 0.18 | 29 min |
| #2 | hiiragi | 763 | 0.20 | 17 min |
| #3 | omeshima | 606 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #4 | ALTO | 384 | 0.26 | 10 min |
| #5 | 中華製 | 334 | 0.26 | 8 min |





