








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 158 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 72 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1654 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,023 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1514 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1591 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1076 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1842 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $487,959 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sf | 65% | 60 |
| #2 | moloch | 57% | 37 |
| #3 | WallNut | 56% | 57 |
| #4 | Vaspox | 54% | 90 |
| #5 | SKRRRRRRAAAAAA | 54% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | moloch | 57% | 37 |
| #3 | WallNut | 56% | 57 |
| #4 | Vaspox | 54% | 90 |
| #5 | SKRRRRRRAAAAAA | 54% | 71 |
| #6 | Manie | 46% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sf | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Vaspox | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | SKRRRRRRAAAAAA | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | moloch | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vaspox | 438 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #2 | SKRRRRRRAAAAAA | 267 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | sf | 241 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #4 | WallNut | 148 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | moloch | 141 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Manie | +4.58 | 84 | 63 |
| #2 | sf | +3.34 | 77 | 71 |
| #3 | Fink | +1.79 | 83 | 56 |
| #4 | SKRRRRRRAAAAAA | +0.27 | 77 | 74 |
| #5 | moloch | -0.22 | 79 | 68 |





